It took me to have cancer to see that I am a brave woman. My hope is that you can discover your strength under less stressful situations. For the month of February, I created an event on facebook called Get Your Brave On! https://www.facebook.com/events/398956176906475/ and I list exercises every 3 days for you to contemplate and practice. Each one is a step closer into yourself, into the power of your heart and soul. Questions and ‘homework’ assignments encourage and support you to look at what you have already done and what you can plan on doing in the future with more confidence.
My intention is to give you this space, this safe community, to uncover your hidden power and heal. Join, comment, inspire others with your words of encouragement. All are welcome, all are surrounded by healing angels when they participate. I hope you feel inclined to join and Get Your Brave On!
Exercises 1 and 2 are below in past posts. Exercise #3 is:
Choose 1 really out of the box, inspiring decision to go forth and put into action by the end of the month-plan a vacation, start sending out resumes if you want a new job, have that heart to heart with your partner or family member you’ve been waiting for the right time to do (no better time than the present), or ask that cute guy out you keep seeing at the coffee shop, start your own business! What have you been keep hearing in your head? Yup, get your brave on! . Ready, set, go!
As I sat in my hotel room the night before my surgery, I thought of the oncologist and his lack of eye contact that afternoon. It made me shiver thinking about how important his job is yet his aloof and uninterested presentation in his office left me feeling so alone, frightened, unloved. Shouldn’t it be part of their bedside manner to give their cancer patients a sense of comfort, at least a gentle reassuring touch? Where was the compassion? Then I remembered, as I closed my eyes in the bed in my hotel room in Boston— that first week back in Portland, frozen, scared, and finally crawling out from my dark corner. I had been guided that week to what would become my answer, my source of compassion, my hope and faith, my life’s purpose…..
A few days after my diagnosis, Ray and I found an apartment in Portland and were able to leave the hotel. I tried to settle into our new home, across the country from my friends and my family. I was so grateful to be out of the one room at the hotel and to have the nights to myself, in a separate room from where Ray slept. I appreciated my dark corner where I spent the wee hours of the morning grieving and trying to catch my breath.
I sat in the peace of the night, allowing my body to quiver and shake. I called to God to help me relax. I imagined the angels and a warm white light surrounding me. When I was a little girl, I was terrified of the dark, being in the blanket of black without any signs of life. I felt unsafe and exposed to an unknown world. I was experiencing the fear of the unknown world but this time for a different reason. I remembered what my brother had taught me when I was younger to help me get over being afraid in the dark, of the dark. His white light trick gave me the power to make it through the nights that first week. I even felt comforted by the gentle caress of the angels; for the first time, the blackness and the quiet felt like velvet. I sunk into that and allowed the black hole of fear that had been in the pit of my stomach transform into a gentle knowing that no matter what, it was going to be ok.
During the day I tried to forget what was happening inside my body. I kept busy setting up my new classroom. My new boss was less than thrilled that I her new teacher was diagnosed with cancer and had to fly back to Boston only weeks into the school year. It was my first experience having to let go of what someone else was thinking of me so that I could focus on taking care of myself.
When I had free time, I spent it watching movies, trying to distract myself and ignore the fear I was carrying. I also walked to the bookstore near my new home and was guided to find the self-healing/alternative healing aisle. There, in front of me, I found the answer to all of my questions, then, now, and forever! The title jumped out at me like a neon sign: The Reiki Sourcebook by Bronwen and Frans Stiene. I had never heard of this before but I pulled the book off the shelf and read it like it was medicine, soaking in every word, feeling every Japanese Kanji character, breathing in the hope and light that emanated from the pages. In that moment, everything changed. My life would never be the same. And I knew right then and there as I sat on the floor in the self-healing aisle at Borders in August, 2005. Reiki. Reiki was going to make it ok that the oncologist couldn’t give me hope or compassion. Reiki was going to dissipate the fear. Reiki was going to get me through this. Reiki would nurture and comfort me through hell and back again. And Reiki would be my life’s purpose. Reiki, it is the way of my soul…..
We ALL have a dream inside of us, whether we know what it looks like or not. We know what brings us joy. We know what doesn’t bring us joy. Sometimes there is a lesson in that which brings us ‘unjoy’. If you are experiencing a situation that is uncomfortable, ongoing, making you ill, find where in your body the sensations are when you think about this situation. Ask what the lesson is. The sooner you recognize this, the sooner you can learn it, accept it as a lesson/experience, thank it and move on. Yes, it can be as simple or as complicated as we make it.
When I had cancer, I asked why, what is the lesson that can possibly be taught from having one of the most deadly forms of disease in the world??? OH, EVERYTHING! My current lifestyle at the time, who my friends were, my constant worrying about everything, doubt, fear, and most important, my life purpose and gratitude for what I have and who I am. BIG lessons that I am sooo thankful for today. I recognized it, thanked it with huge kudos, and now have a healing practice, honoring my life purpose knowing that without that lesson, I, and others I assist with on their healing journey, would not be here to day in the way that we are, showing up more confidently and divinely. Cancer free and living to serve, that is my calling, that is my joy <3.
What do you think you are ready to look at and thank and let go of?
Visit www.InsyncEnergy.com to find out more about how Reiki and Energy Healing was what saved my life from cancer and how it can help you, too! For any illness or emotional trauma. ANYTHING if you are ready to heal and let go. With a mentor by your side, I can assist you with the process along the way. Love to you on your journey! I hope our paths cross one day.
There is so much talk and truth about the importance of physical health, exercise, and nutrition-the 3-D parts of us. There is an aspect of our bodies that go unnoticed, ignored, pushed way down deep hoping never to be seen again. Emotions, the voice of the heart, do not always have a place in our culture. But they have ended up being very rampant in their physical forms in countries across the world that do not give value to emotional health.
As a cancer survivor, I am here to tell you that those ignored parts of us do not disappear because we have turned our backs on them. When unaddressed, left to spoil while unattended to, an unresolved emotion finds a way to resurface, to get the attention of the soul who has denied it a voice.
Emotions tucked away have the potential to manifest as physical symptoms. Whether we do not have time to address them or risk societal backlash, emotions go unmet while the soul is still longing for recognition of them. Our emotional self is very much a part of the whole self, as significant to our health as the physical.
Negative or ignored emotions remain somewhere in the body, causing an energetic wedge that disrupts the vital flow of life force energy that is keeping us alive, nourishing all our body parts. This obstruction prevents our body from being fully and properly nourished on a physical level. Consider what it feels like when you try to keep from crying-something like a lump in the throat, often causing a pain in the heart and can take your breath away. Think how years and years of suppressing these emotions play havoc on you and your body.
My emotions that I did want to address, sadness and ager around my father leaving when I was little, always feeling like I wasn’t good enough or smart enough or pretty enough, they eventually had had enough of being ignored and unresolved! My body grew tired of trying to function inefficiently with all of the emotional wedges keeping my life force energy from flowing freely and healthy. It finally manifested as a cancer, right in the back of my heart chakra!
It wasn’t over night that I recognized them all. But as I recovered, I committed to retrieving the rest of them. I was quite finished with the idea of having to endure cancer again. Emotional health and healing is not quick or easy, but it can be simple. Self-care is the first step to emotional healing and health. What is self-care? However you feel taking care of ALL aspects of you can be accomplished. It is an easier road when you choose a modality that helps you uncover those unmet needs you have been ignoring, one of them most likely is caring for yourself ;-).
The work I offer as a Reiki Master Teacher and Intuitive Self-Care Mentor is primarily to gently and compassionately guide you through your emotional AND physical healing, together, not separately. Insync Energy healing sessions are designed to assist you with finding which needs and emotions are calling you to acknowledge them. I create a safe and supportive space where we take an intuitive journey to your soul, your heart, and heal what has been holding you back, delaying proper health and happiness.
You can say YES to emotional healing and agree to cross that bridge. If not, you can jog, climb that stairmaster 7 days a week, take your supplements, and eat your veggies but still not reach your ultimate goal or feel fully satisfied. Under the muscles and heart rate and healthy pulse, lies an energetic and emotional heart waiting for its moment in the sun.
Insync Energy sessions can show you how to accomplish this holistic view of healing all aspects of you. Interested in learning how to create a healthy body from the physical you to the outer layers of your aura and soul? Visit www.InsyncEnergy.com and read about my unique and loving alternative to unhealthy emotional stagnation. It is time to heal and shine!
Live or via phone/skype, we can gently uncover those emotions waiting for a chance to speak their voice, be heard, and healed.
When I first began this healing journey, I had know idea what was in store for me (and frankly, for those around me!).
Cancer triggered my new goal in life, to heal and to stop the frustration of feeling that I am not what or who I thought I would be by now. What I discovered immediately was that cancer was only the tip of the iceberg. And that healing is an ongoing process, every day, almost of every minute of the day.
Sometimes I wonder with a sigh if living blindly would have been easier. Of course, in the long run, it would not have been, but I do admit it can be exhausting at times. Like yesterday when I considered throwing in the old smelly dish towel.
This is how I usually feel after visiting and spending a long time with family. We often work through issues that come up and feel and believe they have been addressed, “fixed” to some degree. Well, it feels great especially if family, or what triggers us, lives far away and not part of our daily routine. Out of sight, out of mind can sometimes feel resolved. Family is here to remind us that we are not done with that issue yet! Thank you family. No, truly, I mean it.
Family brings up emotions we thought were taken care of, healed, but come to realize have only been suppressed. Serious stuff like the ability to develop healthy relationships, self esteem, money issues, the chance to really find happiness without guilt and shame. Each time I visit home, I am reminded of this. Distance and avoidance can play serious tricks on the heart. I can pretend, I can run, I can live 3000 miles away from home. But when I return, so too does: the guilt of not having grandchildren for my mother, choosing to live so far away from her even though she would never have left her mother, sibling battles, self esteem issues involving past and present decisions, sibling insults we throw at each other stemming from old childhood pain, and most important, the idea that there is financial lack and hardship and money is stressful and secretive and worth fighting about…..Augh, I thought we took care of all of this shit!
Breathe. Relax shoulders. Think love. And the gift of Reiki. Yes, the answer to all of life, good and difficult. The memories and pictures of last week’s visit flood my mind and fill me with those unpleasant feelings of anxiety, sadness, guilt, shame….. Overly dramatic, perhaps, but my body’s way of telling me these issues are not yet resolved and may hold me back. Childhood experiences, adult experiences with the old family beliefs, affect my choices and perpetuate my fears.
This is where Reiki saves my life, again.
I call in the healing energy, hold it to my heart, and ask for gentle, soothing comfort. I ask to replace the uncovered pain with love and healing energy. This does not make it disappear. It adds new perspective to old wounds. It transforms my view from victim to observer. Painful triggers and memories are easier to look at as an observer-it is more likely to watch or replay in this role as fewer emotions will arise. What was learned? What can be done to change it for next time? What was I needing and not getting? What was the other person needing and feeling?
Reiki balances emotions so that any issue can be viewed from a less traumatic lens. Thinking of family while using Reiki is a tool like no other. My relapses after visiting home are shorter since I have adopted my Reiki practice. And I do believe that while with family, I am able to stay grounded and centered more often than not by calling in Reiki during stressful moments.
Every family has stressful moments. Reiki can give us freedom from the cords that bind us. Feel free to contact me if you have questions about how Reiki can help you break away from the old ways of how you work with your family. http://www.insyncenergy.com. Distance healings are always available.You may discover a whole new world that can include loving and spending time with even the toughest of family members. Family is a big part of life. We can find ways to enjoy all family has to offer us. As I am reminded often, without family, we wouldn’t be here 😉
When I recall hearing the words, “You have cancer,” I remember wanting to fall to the floor. I felt and heard my heart beating like never before. Everything seemed to turn into slow motion. The unexplainable emotions grip the soul, the sleepless nights, the pacing in the dark, that feeling of forgetting to breathe all took hold pretty quickly. The first few nights I spent walking around in the dark, feeling lost, scared, and confused, similar to being lost in a corn maize with no visible way out. I even started to watch tele-evangelists at 3 in the morning, searching for hope and words from God. There were some moments I felt as if they were talking directly to me. Yes, I received some helpful words of wisdom tuning into the 700 Club! We filter and take in what we need, right? At that moment, at 3 in the morning, I heard words that helped me get through the night.
7 years ago now seems like a life time ago. I immediately found personal support, books, and alternative healing. Incredible women like Louise Hay and Doreen Virtue kept my head up high and my positive thoughts streaming through my head day and night. I stopped pacing and kept reading and calling in the light. At night when I could not sleep, I meditated and called in every color of the rainbow, each with its own healing frequency. I asked everyone I knew to send prayers. I felt those prayers and kept on leaping forward through every obstacle. I surrounded myself with loving, compassionate people, some healers who gave me tools for life. My Reiki Master, and her Reiki Share Circles, that was my true place of healing and solace. The love and support I found there was immeasurable and gave me all I needed that year. Friends. Nurture. Support. Love.
What I learned then, and continue to apply to my life to this day, is that healing doesn’t end. It is a lifelong process. Scars often remain, physically and emotionally. There are lessons to be learned from dis-ease and tragedy. I will sometimes read or hear about someone with cancer or in an abusive relationship or having had a loved one pass away. This brings me back to my own experiences , a sign that it is time to revisit a situation, to go back and see if there is more to learn from it. Well, today I did just that. I read a blog that shared how to get through the hard times after hearing one has cancer. It was what I was planning on writing about today. But then I discovered something else. Part of the blog discussed being aware of what your body is telling you when it is in pain.
I looked back on the first few weeks after receiving my news, and tried to distinguish what my body was experiencing. I revisit the anguish. It is shocking to recognize that where my body felt fear and anxiety was my heart! I honestly sit here for the first time and am aware of this new piece of information that my subconscious mind is now revealing to me. It is now 7 years later and I am happy, healthy, and teaching Reiki and Angelic Healing to adults and children all over Portland, Oregon. I sit here right now and realize I have some more healing to do and it wasn’t at all what I expected. Heart, we have some work to do. I love you and will never again ignore you.
Insync Energy, Reiki, and Chakra Healing 